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Thursday, October 20, 2011

FORGIVE yourself

According to writer Gini Grey, blaming yourself for the mistakes that you committed doesn't help and only causes more pain. You have to free yourself from the pain and its haunting memory by forgiving yourself. You have to forgive yourself so that you'll be free from the pain and guilt and move on.

Below are ways on how to forgive yourself:

ACCEPTANCE.
We have to accept within ourselves that we are not perfect and therefore destined to screw up every now and then. Accepting responsibility is taking the naked look at ourselves, seeing the good, the bad and the ugly. Making mistakes today help us make better decisions tomorrow.

LEARN from the mistakes.
We must learn from the incident and we must not repeat it. We must not allow making mistakes to condemn us. Not forgiving yourself is like condemning an innocent man.

COMPASSION.
To heal yourself with forgiveness, it's important to have compassion.

UNDERSTANDING.
In order to forgive yourself for past mistakes, it helps to understand why things happened. Sometimes mistakes happened for the sole purpose of learning and growth.

ANGER Management

According to the author of the book "A time to be free", anger is our nemesis. When we allow ourselves to be swept away by this turbulent emotion, it takes us to places we don't want to go. It doesn't matter why we're right or wrong or if anger is a proper response. Our unrestrained anger can make us do irrational and harmful things. We insult those we love, we create problems at work; we cause emotional and even physical damage. And we demean ourselves. Afterwards, we invariably feel regret, guilty and embarrassment for things we've said and done. We obsessively rehash our words and actions, our response of those we've hurt, the discomfort we now feel, the strained relationship that we've created. Upon sober reflection, it becomes crystal clear once again that uncontrolled anger causes not only pain and disharmony in our lives, but also causes us to regress spiritually and become alienated from God. You have the right to your anger, but you also bring misery to other people's lives.

Here are some ways to control one's anger as cited by angermanagement:
- Consciously determine to be calm.
Don't react, think! Remember your goals and respond appropriately.

- Communicate.
when someone upsets you, tell him or her. calmly talk to that person about how you
feel about his or her words and actions. learn to express yourself better-clear
and composed.

- Remove yourself from the scene until you can respond without anger.
your success will not happen overnight. take one step at a time.

- Do something you enjoy.
like walking, swimming, watching a good movie and the like.

- Turn to God.
Be angry but do not sin, do not let the sun sets on your anger and do not leave
room for the devil. ephesians 4:26-27